By the time Freezer emerged victorious in the thrilling four-way dance match, he had little idea what was going on and could barely keep himself balanced.

“I was extremely intoxicated and still won,” Freezer explained, “That’s how you play beer pong.”

The victory was quite impressive for Freezer as he overcame worthy opponents in Fote, Tank, and T-Love. He will now face King Gah in the main event of Clash of the Crunked for the World Heavyweight Championship.

“I wasn’t even 100% and still won the match,” Freezer added, “no one can deny my talent now.”

Like most four-way dance beer pong matches, this one was fast and intense. Right out of the gate, T-Love found himself on the receiving end of most of the shots.

“I knew we had to come out hard on T-Love,” Tank said. “You don’t let a guy like him get comfortable shooting or else he’ll pick your cups apart.”

The strategy proved to be a successful one. The pressure forced T-Love to rush his shots and he was the first eliminated, having only managed to sink a few of his opponents’ cups.

As the match progressed, Tank gradually built a lead for himself with Fote missing the majority of his shots and Freezer attempting to hang back and bide his time.

A pumped up Tank managed to get a 3 cups to 1 lead on Fote and looked ready to take charge of the match. However, with impeccable timing, Fote entered one of his infamous “hot streaks from nowhere”, hitting Tank’s 3 remaining cups all in succession, eliminating him from the match.

“That just pisses me off,” raged a disgusted Tank. “One moment he’s completely uncoordinated and then he goes and does that! I don’t care what anyone says, I was the better man in that match.”

Suddenly, Freezer held a 2 cups to 1 advantage, but due to his high alcohol level, winning would still be an enormous task.

“I’m not gonna lie,” Freezer recalls, “Fote’s last cup was spinning all over the place.”

When Freezer threw his ball, and missed by over a foot, all signs pointed to victory for Fote.

The match was not without controversy, however, as one could argue that Freezer acted unethically while Fote became distracted picking up the loose pong ball.

With no referee present, Freezer moved Fote’s last cup to the center of the table, then easily sunk a pong ball into it for the win.

Fote was outraged.

“That’s bullshit, man,” screamed Fote, “Freezer is a cheater.”

Freezer insists he did nothing wrong.

“I saw an opportunity and exploited it, like any great competitor,” Freezer explains, “and that’s why I’ll be in the main event of yet another pong-per-view.”