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11/26/2007-
Can Iceman be Beaten in Flip Cup?
The
undisputed Flip Cup Champion since The
Great American Beer Bash, Iceman shows no signs of slowing
down anytime soon.
“I
am the world’s greatest flip cupper. You all know it’s
true,” says the champ.
Although
Iceman’s opponents for Clash of the Crunked have yet
to be determined, flip cup experts across the world doubt
that anyone will be able to pry the belt from his hands.
“He’s
just unbelievable,” says Jake Glendale, a longtime fan
of the flamboyant superstar, “I haven’t seen flip
cup talent like that since the late Johnny Barton was champion
back in 1964.”
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For
many months, Iceman has been the class of the Flip
Cup Division. |
The
bookies in Las Vegas have already set the spread at an astounding
five cups for Iceman’s title defense at Clash of the
Crunked, which makes him the largest favorite in professional
flip cup in over thirty years.
“Gamblers
have been cashing in on Iceman all year with his lopsided
victories in flip cup championship final rounds,” says
racketeer Tony Rosetti, “we had no choice but to raise
the spread as high as it is.”
What
does Iceman think of this enormous spread?
“I
find it very flattering,” Iceman says, “But don’t
be surprised if I end up betting against myself and then let
my opponents only lose by two cups.”
As
it stands now, the outlook appears very bright for Iceman
to retain his championship. The only other noteworthy news
surrounding this match is that, in recent weeks, rumors have
circulated that former Flip Cup Champion Fat
Shit has been training for a comeback. However, Iceman
is not worried about it.
“Even
if the Fat Shit does comeback, he’s still a slob, and
he’ll still lose. But by all means, I encourage his
comeback, as I’d be happy to embarrass him some more.”
Iceman said.
Iceman
is reportedly so confident about his upcoming title defense,
that he is focusing more of his energy in finding a high-profile
sponsor than in practicing for the match.
“When
you’re blessed with good looks and skill like I am,
it’s only natural to want to sell out for the right
price,” Iceman says, “If any company is interested,
I welcome them to get in touch with me. I alone can increase
sales of anything by over 300%.”
We’ll
have more on the upcoming Flip Cup Championship match as it
breaks.
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