Iceman
/ Tank Interview
With
The Great American Beer Bash rapidly approaching,
we managed to get Iceman to take some time out of his busy
schedule to talk with WorldBeerPongFederation.com:
WBPF.com:
"Welcome. Glad you could be here today."
Iceman:
"Yo guys."
WBPF.com:
"Over the past year, some people have called your character
into question. Some believe that your entire persona is
just a way of bringing attention to yourself."
Iceman:
"Some people mistakenly think I'm self-centered, but
the truth is, everytime I step up to the pong table, or
anywhere in general, I'm performing a public service. For
whatever reason, I've been blessed with unparalleled beauty
and talent. I feel that it's my responsibility to put both
of those things on display for others to view and admire."
WBPF.com:
"But why oil yourself up? Why wear a fur coat and fur
boots?"
Iceman:
"Because I happen to have excellent taste in clothes
and style. I'm aware that how I look deviates from the tastes
of mainstream America, but that's not my fault, it's America's.
I can't help it if my tastes are above that of the average
person."
WBPF.com:
"It has come to our attention that there are children
out there who view you as a sort of role model. What do
you have to say to the youth who aspire to be as good looking
and talented as you someday?"
Iceman:
"You can never be as beautiful or talented as me, so
don't even bother unless you're willing to settle for second
best."
WBPF.com:
"Thank you for your time and good luck at the Great
American Beer Bash."
Iceman:
"Later guys."
We were
intrigued by Iceman's confidence in both himself and his
abilities so we managed to track down Tank, his opponent
at the Great American Beer Bash, and see if there was anything
he wished to add:
WBPF.com:
"Now that you've seen what Iceman thinks of himself
going into this match, what are your thoughts concerning
him?"
Tank:
"First of all, I just want to remind the public that
it doesn't matter where you live or what social class you
belong to, there is absolutely nothing masculine about his
appearance. Real men keep their hair short, grow beards,
and wear T-shirts instead of fur."
WBPF.com:
"That being said, there's obviously alot of pride at
stake going into this match and Iceman claims to be an extremely
talented individual. What is your strategy going into The
Great American Beer Bash?"
Tank:
"I don't need any strategy. Iceman's talents are greatly
exaggerated to begin with. The fact that I'm a bigger man
than him will be enough to get me into the winner's column."
WBPF.com:
"Thank you very much for your time."
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